Iron Chef: Furry Federation

[miokalia]

If you haven't seen the TV show Iron Chef, go look it up and come back.

Basically what this is: is a showcase of the cuisines of the federation in the format of an Iron Chef show.
What that means is: every nation/cuisine has it's own resident Iron Chef of that style. A challenger then participates in a culinary battle in that style with the iron chef (This is to avoid the problem of Taro Q Allosaurus battling Ta Le O'Teerie with completely different cooking styles which will end with a fistfight and some very *very* sick judges. Hypothetically)
So.
Your reply would be a kitchen battle having to do with your nation's cuisine. This allows each player to decorate their iron chef presentation and theatrics any way they wish. As well as allowing each player to define their own cuisine.

So in the phonetic misinterpretation of Chairman Kaga:
"Ahhiiyyaaa Koshiiiii!"
(begin)

[Kingdoms of Cal]

Ya started producing a traditional teerie dish of finely chop fungi and native plants. Steamed to ensure the flavor was maintained with a few beetle grubs fried in local herbs neatly placed on top of the fungi and plants.

Unfortunately as nice as the dish tasted and looked it had some what narcotic and hallucinogenic effects on non-teerie.

Think space cakes and LSD.

[miokalia]

Challenger Tapokua Borduille runs a fine restaurant in Emayshira.
Narrarator explains,
"A crossroads of divergent cuisines has created a taste unlike it's cultural contributors. The french influence from the choeaux combined with the different dietary requirements and restrictions of the reptilian diet have created a dairyless, lean and starchy methodology to cooking specific to that region."

"Borduille will now challenge one of our iron chefs to a battle here in Furry Federation's own kitchen stadium.
Select your challenge."

The feathered raptor adorned with chef attire pauses a moment for dramatic effect and then points to the painting of Iron Chef: Kohtohkhan, Kabo Potak.
The painting depicts him wearing a green and grey chef's outfit, holding a... slightly menacing looking curly cutting tool, with another claw over the lid to a culinary centrifuge.

Dramatic music plays, smoke and lights and other theatrics ensue and Chef Potak rises from a stage elevator below the painting.

"Challenger Borduille has picked Iron Chef Potak for this culinary contest which bridges different reptilian cuisines. The judges are either in for a trully ground-shattering culinary experience... or they are going to be very very sick."

The chairman steps up to the front table, where the secret theme ingredient lays covered. Dramatic music plays and he reaches to pull away the cloth.

"And the secret ingredient is.", he says suspensfully...

Whoosh. He pulls away the cloth and reveals a mountain of...

peanuts.

The narrarator comes back on and begins to give a backstory about peanuts,
"Peanuts never have been the staple of any reptilian cuisine but in the mountain teraces of Garantoh where they were grown as a grain-like food product. Peanuts enhance the flavoring of the sometimes intensely salty Kohtohkhan cuisine and became very important in the creation of dessert shell cups. Peanuts have long been a garnish in the Choeaux French-inspired cuisine. Often taking the place of dairy items and cheeses in such items."

Back to the chairman, who announces the beginning of the kitchen battle.
"Ale Cuisine!", he yells. And they're off.

"We can see Iron Chef Potak tossing a bag on unshelled peanuts to his assistants. They are emptying them into... yes.. that is a tray presumably for roasting. This is a bit of an odd approach for him but then again this is an odd situation"

"Borduille is now putting the peanuts into a blender, yes... he is going to make a paste."

"Yes indeed, he plans on making the peanuts into a paste, I don't know what this is going to be"

"Potak now has an assitant chopping green onions. Now this is the kind of fare we should expect from this style. Heavily reliant on garlics and onions for base flavoring. Now the question is the meats they will use... and how much."

"Yes that's true. It is no secret that meats by weight dominate the proportions of almost all reptilian cuisines. However, the treatments which are prepared on these meats vary substantially from culture to culture."

"It looks like Borduille is now... yes he his preshredding what looks like a slab of crab... yes he is doing it with his bare hands."

"Indeed, Vutcka Szohokh or 'getting to know the meat'. It is a tactile familiary where the cook consemmate's a relationship with the food by ripping it into pieces."

"I do hope those claws are clean"

"LOL. It looks like Potak is now beating the peanuts into pieces on the tray, he is now spreading them over a whole slab of codsteak.
It seems Potak is skipping the ripping."

"Highly unusual approach"

"yes indeed"

And now lets take a look at that codsteak again with the BigMart Replay.

"Yes, this is a codsteak. It seemed he took a moment before selecting this, he considered salmon for a moment, but then chose not to because it might be 'too salty' for the judges taste."



And we'll be back after some commercials.